10 Powerful Questions to Get Yourself Out of a Rut

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It happens to the best of us: sometimes we cannot help but feel stuck in a rut. Suddenly, life loses its spark, as you can no longer find joy and contentment in what once excited you…

“Am I destined to feel like this forever?”. And, most importantly, “How do I pull myself out of this rut?” – are only two of the things you might wondering…

As normal as it is to feel discouraged and hopeless when you’re in a funk, I’m also here to tell you two good news:

1. No, you won’t feel like this forever! (I pinky promise)
2. Yes, you can get unstuck – and I’m here to show you exactly how! 😉

In this article, you’ll discover:

• The most common signs of stuckness you should watch out for
• The power of self-awareness to pull yourself out of the funk
• 10 powerful questions you need to ask yourself if you’re feeling hopeless

So, are you ready to learn how to get out of your rut? Then, let’s get started!

DISCLAIMER: This blog is reader-supported. When you buy through links on this site, I may earn an affiliate commission (which won’t affect your final price). I only promote products that I consider valuable and beneficial for you. If you decide to purchase something – Thank you for buying me a cup of coffee! xx

What Does Being Stuck in a Rut Feel Like?

It ain’t fun.

Days go by and they all feel the same.

Every burst of joy and excitement has left your body cells.

You are going through the days on autopilot.

All you do or want to do is either be on your phone, eat, or sleep. Or all three.

It’s not the random lazy Sunday – or rot day – you engage in every fortnight.

Nor opting for a cozy night-in when all your friends are going out.

And it ain’t skipping washing your day, only because you’re too tired and’ll do it tomorrow.

When you’re stuck in a rut, you’ll experience:

• Extreme fatigue
• Resistance to change
• Serious procrastination
• Inability to stay focused
• Consistent and persistent negative thoughts
• Major indecision

Now that you know and recognize the symptoms of your rut – it’s time to understand how you can finally pull yourself out of it!

📌 SHORT ON TIME? PIN IT FOR LATER! 📌

How to Stop Feeling Hopeless When You’re Stuck in a Rut

I’m an advocate for feeling your feelings – as they all serve a purpose.

Although, there is a fine line between embracing your suffering and dwelling in the pain.

And no, you can’t sit in the pain forever. (Even if that’d be easier)

The best thing you can do to change the way you feel is to start by changing your situation.

RELATED: Read here “11 Crucial Signs It’s Time to Change Your Life”

What to Do If You Feel Stuck in A Rut

If you’ve read the list of common symptoms above and recognized yourself in one or more, I’m sorry to break it to you but – you can’t hide anymore!

It’s time for you to fully acknowledge you’ve fallen into a rut.

It’s not your fault – it’s just life! 

Stepping out of the denial mode is the first step of this journey – as there are 6 steps involved in change:

1. Denial
2. Awareness
3. Acceptance
4. Desire
5. Result
6. Action

Once you know that something needs to be fixed – and so become aware of the problem, you can start thinking of solutions.

But yeah, you must be aware that there is a problem in the first place 😉

As you’re reading this article, I guess you’re falling somewhere in between steps #2 or #3. 

Before moving to the next steps – which involves you feeling ready to address the elephant in the room -, you must not skip the important step of accepting your problem.

Accept that you’re stuck – and know it doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with you.

Everyone, sooner or later in life, will experience feeling trapped in a life that no longer fits them. 

And it is only when the current mold we’re in no longer fits us that we feel the need and desire to change and evolve.

Why? Because it’s in human nature the desire to wanting to improve and get better. It’s one of the most natural – and beautiful – aspects of human nature.

How can I help you in this process?

Below, I’ll provide you with 10 powerful questions to raise your awareness and get clear on the desired change you want for your life – so that you’ll leave this article feeling ready to take action!

Because only your actions can lead to the results you’re hoping for 😉

10 Powerful Questions to Get Yourself Out of a Rut

Grab a pen and paper – or open a Word document – and let’s get started writing!

1. What areas of my life do feel stagnant? Why am I feeling this way?

When you’re in a rut, it’s so easy to think of your life as a total failure.

It’s because your perspective ain’t straight, and your thoughts are biased.

You’re filtering your whole life through negative lenses. But, is your entire life so bad?

Your life can be described as the sum of these 9 categories:

• Health (mental and physical)
• Personal growth
• Sense of self
• Fun, hobbies & passions
• Connection & relationships (family, friends, partner)
• Career
• Finances
• Spirituality, meaning & purpose
• Community & contribution

PRO TIP: Download the free bundle “Dream Life Planner” and use the “Wheel of Life” to assess your overall life quality:

Even when you feel at your lowest, I’m sure it’s not all bad.

So, taking a look at your overall quality of life – are you able to pinpoint exactly what areas are making you suffer the most? And, even more specifically, why do you feel stuck in those areas of your life?

For example:

• Maybe you’re not quite content with your love life, as things got boring with your partner and you don’t feel seen and valued enough
• Or maybe you’re feeling stuck because you forgot how to have a good time and are in desperate need of making more room for fun in your life
• Perhaps, your 9-5 is draining you so much that you can’t wait to finally launch your blog and send your 2-week notice

It’s impossible that your life is all bad. I don’t believe you! (Hey – you’re free to make your point in the comments below if you want to try to change my mind 😉 )

Raise your awareness by getting clear and specific on what’s making you feel stuck by asking yourself:

“What areas of my life do feel stagnant? Why am I feeling this way?”

2. What childhood dreams or interests have I abandoned, and why?

It’s shocking to me to think how much I used to complain when I was a teenager.

Now that I’m a couple of years older (and supposedly wiser), I realize life was pretty simple as a teenager.

There were no obligations whatsoever, no responsibilities, and no bills to pay.

Just plenty of free time to do what we wanted and liked. (For me, that was reading and writing…Mmh, are you starting to notice a pattern too? 😉 )

While I can consider myself lucky enough for having (almost) always held onto tight to my two biggest passions – reading and writing -, I know it’s not the same case for everyone.

Most young adults get overwhelmed with responsibilities, tasks, bills, meetings, and invitations they cannot say no to – but, at what cost?

The price they pay is forgetting about all the things that mattered to them the most…

Even I have to admit that – because of time constraints, (or more a bunch of excuses) – I have given up on activities that would bring me so much joy back in the days! 

It’s like: growing up, we stop doing everything that made us feel content and alive – yet we wonder why we don’t know ourselves and what we want out of life!

What if we knew what we had to do from the beginning, but we just got lost in the way?

This is your sign to think back to all the hobbies, activities, and fun things you used to do growing up for the pure joy of doing them.

Not because they would make you money. Not because cause that what’s was asked you to do. And not because it was another thing to check off from your to-do list.

Being a teenager was simple – yet we made it so complicated.

What if being an adult is quite simple too, and we’re just overcomplicating it?

It’s time for you to reconnect with your inner child – starting with this question:

“What childhood dreams or interests have I abandoned, and why?”

3. What are my core values?

Here’s the number one reason why you don’t know what you want – and so you end up feeling stuck in a rut in the process of “finding yourself”: you don’t know what you value.

Your core values are the key to creating a meaningful and extraordinary life – one that fits you and your interests, not the one others expect of you.

Yet, how many of us ever take the time to sit down and reflect on what we value most in life?

We go from one decision to the other; from one route to the other – yet they all feel wrong! Why is that?

Every choice that’s not in alignment with your most authentic self will feel wrong.

As a consequence, if you never take the time to define your top 3 to 5 core values, you’ll end up feeling lost in life, again, and again.  And again. And again. 

Your core values can help you make the most important decisions in your life. So, the sooner you get clear on them, the better. 

PSST. Let me help you out! 😉 Grab your free “Value Compass Workbook” and tune in with your most authentic self:

4. If I were given only 5 years of life, what would I try to accomplish within the next 5 years?

It’s not easy – nor fun – to think of your life as it was over already. But…it works.

It works so well when you’re stuck in a rut and don’t know how to pull yourself out of it!

One of our biggest problems is to think and act – or don’t act – as if we were to live forever.

We know our time here is limited, yet we behave as if it were endless.

The days go by. So do the months. And the years.

We accumulate layers of excuses to justify our inaction.

We protect ourselves behind the limits of our own minds.

Only to look back, when it’s too late, regretting all we haven’t done and thinking about all that we could’ve accomplished, instead – if we only gave us the chance to try.

We postpone decisions.

We put our dreams on hold.

And we convince ourselves that “we’ll do it tomorrow” – only to repeat it, again and again, day after day.

But, what if we started to see time for what it really is? A limited resource that can only go down, and never come back.

Because I’m pretty sure that – if today you were to find out you had only 5 years of life left – you’d do something different.

You’d shoot your shot.

You’d try to go for it.

Whatever that “it” is.

Whether it’s launching your business.

Traveling the world.

Writing a novel.

Or saying to someone how you really feel about them.

So, why are you waiting? You don’t have forever.

Acknowledge this hard truth and ask yourself:

“If I were given only 5 years of life, what would I try to accomplish within the next 5 years?”

5. What would I advise a friend in the same situation?

When you’re in the middle of chaos, you cannot think straight.

That’s the reason why one of the most powerful questions you could ask yourself to get out of your rut is:

“What would I advise a friend in the same situation?”

Because it’s easier to reflect when we’re not the ones in the eye of the tornado…

So, let’s pretend that whatever is happening to you is not happening to you – rather to your best friend!

They come to you, all worked up and panicking, asking you for a piece of advice. What would you say?

Write a letter, an email, or a text message – as if you were really to send it to them. Or record yourself – if that’s more your style.

But remember: it’s not your life, and it’s not your problem.

We’re far better at giving advice rather than applying them to our own lives…That’s why so many people can’t practice what they preach.

So, if your problem wasn’t something personal, but was completely unrelated to you and didn’t affect you in the smallest, possible way ever – how would you face it?

That’s exactly what you must do.

6. What goals do sound exciting and fun now?

When life has lost its park, it’s easy to fall trapped into the usual, boring, and flavorless routine…

While not every day can exactly feel like Carnival in Rio, it also shouldn’t bore you to death.

When you feel meaningless and lack purpose – that’s exactly when you need to realize that: you’re in charge of your life!

You’re the one behind the steering wheel – so act like it! 

Is your life boring to death? Start thinking about ways you could make it less boring, then!

Sorry to break it to you, but – if you don’t make an effort to add fun to your life, your life will be no fun! 

One of the best ways to make your life more fun and exciting is to have something meaningful to work towards!

It’s time to pull up your sleeves and set some new goals that can get you all fired up for the future!

And, as much as you’d love to completely reinvent your life overnight, I’m sorry to break it to you (again) but that’s unlikely to happen…

When approaching setting new goals, you should make sure you find the sweet spot between stretching yourself – enough that you step out of your comfort zone – without going too far by setting unrealistic goals.

I recommend you try Warren Buffett’s goal-setting technique and:

• Write a list of 25 life goals
• Circle your top 3-5
• Break them down into:
  • Long-term → What do you want to achieve in 3 years?
  • Medium-term → What do you want to achieve in 1 year?
  • Short-term → What do you want to achieve in 3 months?
• Now it’s time to:
  • Develop a strategy for your long-term goal
  • Make a timeline and plan out your medium-term goal
  • Find a daily action that can help you get closer to your short-term goal

Cause, whether you realize it or not – life is more fun when you’re working towards the right goals! 😉

So, get out of your funk by asking yourself:

“What goals do sound exciting and fun now?”

7. Pretending I’d wake up being someone else – how would I behave and live life?

Especially if you’ve been stuck in a rut for a while, you might have gotten tired of being you. You’re simply tired of feeling like you. 

So, what if you could be someone else?

What if tomorrow you’d wake up only to find out you’re [insert here your favorite person on the planet]?

What would change if you could be someone else?

How would you change if you could be someone else?

We live most of our lives based on who we used to be – even if that’s not who we are anymore…

Just because you used to be in one way, it doesn’t mean you have to keep staying the same.

Your future self can – and will – be different from your past self. And that’s on growth! (And thank God – I might add!)

But, as mentioned in the point above, it’s much harder to gain a clear perspective when we’re in the middle of the matter. So, why don’t you step out of your shoes, for a day, only to step into someone else’s?

What would the person you admire the most do? How would they behave? What would they think? How would they go about their day?

You have the power to pull yourself out of the rut you’re in and completely reinvent yourself.

And, if you don’t know where to start – start with this simple question:

“Pretending I’d wake up being someone else – how would I behave and live life?”

8. Who am I jealous of?

Who you envy says a lot about what you want. Whose life are you jealous of? Because that, my friend, it’s your dream lifestyle…

Think about it: you don’t pay attention to what you don’t care about.

Society tends to see badly the feelings of jealousy and envy, making us feel guilty for desiring something someone else has.

In my opinion, those strong emotions are there to signal your deepest, most authentic desires!

So, why not use those sensations to your advantage?

Why not consider them as the catalyst that can lead you to creating and living your dream life?

Instead of blaming yourself for being envious of someone or something – use that emotion to better understand yourself.

Be brave enough to ask yourself:

“Who am I jealous of?”

The answer to that question is the key to creating a life you’ll love!

9. How can I reframe my perspective to make it benefit me?

What if you’re seeing your situation from the wrong angle?

What if you’re looking at what has happened to you from a flawed perspective?

The truth is that: what happens to us is neither good nor bad. It’s what we think of it that makes it good or bad!

It’s not easy to find a lesson in everything that happens, but I firmly believe that everything happens for a reason…It’s up to us to figure out what there’s to learn.

Maybe the fact that your boyfriend broke your heart doesn’t feel like a blessing now, but it will feel like it when you meet your real soulmate.

Perhaps, you’ll feel like a failure for not having obtained that dream job you wanted; but what if it’s because there’s another one out there that’s even better for you?

Or maybe you don’t understand what this loneliness has to teach you, only to surprise yourself with feeling content and at peace on a random day as you take yourself out for a solo (but not lonely) dinner.

You can’t always change what happens to you – but you can always, always, always change the way you perceive it.   

The powerful question you can ask yourself to change your perspective is:

“How can I reframe my perspective to make it benefit me?”

10. What small actions can I take to improve my daily routine, now, and get closer to living my dream life?

Finally, this last question has the purpose of getting yourself closer to step #5 of change: taking action.

Cause the truth is: I could write 10 other questions for you to answer, or I could come up with a 5-step practical guide to beat the funk but, the only thing that can really help you get unstuck is to take action.

You need to get up and get moving. (Yes, even if that’s the last thing you feel like doing now…)

You can have the best intentions, come up with realistic goals, and create the perfect game plan, but – if you fail to take action consistently, nothing is going to change.

So, without putting too much pressure on yourself, all I want you to do is start brainstorming some small steps you can take to get out of your rut.

“What small actions can I take to improve my daily routine, now, and get closer to living my dream life?”

Whether that’s:

• Drinking a big glass of water
• Reading 1 page of a book
• Going for a 5-minute walk
• Reflecting on your values
• Putting down the phone
• Waking up 5 minutes earlier
• Journaling about one of my self-discovery prompts

Take action. Do something now. Action creates more action.

“A body in motion tends to stay in motion unless acted on by an outside force.”
– Isaac Newton

Conclusion

That’s all for me today!

Remember that it’s ok to feel stuck in life, now and then. It’s not necessarily a bad thing – it all depends on how you want to see it! 😉

After all, if you weren’t in a rut you wouldn’t have found this article and my blog – so I think you were lucky, don’t you? 😉 

You can – and will – get better. In case no one told you, I love you and I believe in you (and so should you)!

Q: “In what areas of your life do you feel stuck” – Let me know in a comment! 🙂

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